This Just In: My Husband is a Bastard
Me: Yeah? She's there a lot.
James: Her husband's phone wasn't working.
James: She called me a bastard.
Me: What?! She's Local-TV-Anchorwoman! She can't do that! What happened?
James: She asked me if we have kids. I told her that we're enjoying it just being the two of us right now.
James: And she said, "You bastard!"