The Stories I Tell ~ from The Word Cellar

Stories. Anecdotes. A free round of words for everyone!

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Location: Pennsylvania, United States

I love stories. I'm the one at social functions with a dozen new anecdotes. But I worry about hogging the conversation. Sometimes I tell myself that I'll be quiet and let others do the talking. But no matter how hard I try, my stories insist on bursting out! Here I can let my stories (the classics that I tell again and again, as well as new ones that unfold along the way) run free. I'm a professional writer and editor, and sole proprietor of The Word Cellar. I write for a variety of publications and clients on everything from green buildings and nuclear reactors to entrepreneurship and the arts. If you need words written, edited, or enlivened, I can help. Contact me.


Laundry Day

Thursday was Laundry Day. With capitalized letters because we were running out of handy things like towels and underwear. I usually do a load of laundry here and there -- it's a luxury of working from home. But I've been in a funk lately and have slacked on my housekeeping duties. Which leads me to this slightly embarrassing, but mostly amusing, tidbit: For the first time ever, I think, I had absolutely no clean underwear to wear. Not even the ugly ones that are all stretched out, or the ones that are just a little ripped at the seam, or even the ones that are maybe just a tad too tight. No undies at all. So what did I do? I dug around in a dresser drawer and found my swimsuit bottoms. Because I needed clean underwear to go to the bank and I couldn't wait for the laundry to be done. I don't remember the last time I actually wore them for swimming, but today they worked just fine as gutchies. By some definitions, swimsuit bottoms are underwear:

Some clothing is specifically underwear, while some is also used as swimsuit (if made of suitable material), and both T-shirts and some shorts are suitable as underwear as well as outer clothing. Suitability as outer clothing is, apart from outdoor or indoor climate, largely a social and sometimes even a legal matter. One of the criteria for shorts not to be suitable as outer clothing may be that it has a fly that avoids exposure of the genitals just by an overlap of cloth, without buttons etc. (Source:

Even though my swimsuit bottoms could be worn as outer wear, I chose to wear pants when I went to the bank. But as I sat there asking for a refund of the $70 in fees that they had wrongly charged me, I secretly knew that at any moment, I was ready to go for a nice refreshing dip from the waist down. If the occasion so arose. Which it didn't. But still. It's good to be prepared.


add to kirtsy | 12:27 AM


Anonymous dMcg...not iMac said...

you could do what i do at times, wear nothing at all under your pants.

1/12/2007 10:19 AM  
Anonymous Allyson said...

They're your POWER PANTIES. And, if all of a sudden the bank collapsed into a sinkhole full of cold, deep water, YOU could swim out of it much more easily in your swim bottoms than you could if you were wearing ordinary, run-of-the-mill undies. You're such a GIRL SCOUT.

1/12/2007 1:14 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Exactly, Allyson. My trainint in the Brownies served me well.

1/12/2007 1:37 PM  
Anonymous Jess said...

I'm picturing you getting frustrated with the bank person, standing up, taking off your pants, grabbing the glass of water from their desk and throwing it dramatically all over your bottom half. It's making me laugh. Out loud.

1/16/2007 3:11 PM  

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